The Tulsa Angry Monkeys beat the Lannisters 195.55–110.95 in Week 4, which is the kind of score that makes you wonder if Lannie's team accidentally got food poisoning at a team dinner they never actually had.
Let's talk about what went right for Jacob, because apparently everything did. Ashton Jeanty put up 35.5 points in his superflex spot, which is the kind of performance that makes you question whether Las Vegas accidentally played him at every position simultaneously. Christian McCaffrey added 26.1. DK Metcalf chipped in 25.6. Baker Mayfield threw for 25.75. Garrett Wilson contributed 20.2. Even Breece Hall, who's had a rougher season, showed up with 16.1.
The Angry Monkeys scored 195 points in a week where nobody else in the league broke 172. It was less of a football game and more of a public service announcement about what happens when every single player on your roster remembers they're supposed to be good at football.
"I thought we'd win by maybe 10 or 15 points," Jacob said afterward, which is the kind of thing you say when you're trying to sound humble but secretly knew this was going to be a massacre.
As for Lannie, well. Patrick Mahomes put up 30 points, which is genuinely excellent and would normally win you a week. Jake Ferguson added 20.5 at tight end. Xavier Worthy flashed for 17.1. These are perfectly respectable fantasy performances that deserved better.
But then we get to the train wreck. David Montgomery managed 1.2 points, which is what happens when you start a running back against a defense that remembered how to tackle. Ladd McConkey posted 2.1 points, continuing his tradition of looking great on your bench and invisible in your lineup. Kyren Williams contributed 10.4, which isn't terrible until you remember his opponent had three players score more than 25.
And then there's the Washington Commanders defense, which scored 2.0 points. The Commanders. In Week 4. Lannie looked at all the available defenses and thought, "You know what? Washington's got this." They did not, in fact, have this.
The loss drops the Lannisters to 2-2, with a points differential of -58.60 that screams "consistently mediocre with occasional disasters." Meanwhile, the Angry Monkeys improve to 3-1 and have officially become the team nobody wants to see on their schedule, because apparently Jacob figured out how to get every single one of his players to have a career week simultaneously.
Some weeks are close. Some weeks come down to Monday night. And some weeks, Ashton Jeanty scores 35.5 points and you lose by 85 despite having Patrick Mahomes throw for 30.
Welcome to Week 4, where Lannie learned that sometimes having the second-best fantasy quarterback in the league just isn't enough when your opponent decides to break the scoring record.